Lipstick and Thujone

oh my god, over dinner El reminded me that last night I said I was fed up of seeing the Eurovision venue in the dark, and that I wanted to see it in the Light Time, and no-one said anything for ages. Then about three minutes later I just said “…day. day time.”　

So in the five hours I spent gardening I

• Hurt my shoulder doing the edges of the grass
• Found a drowned dead rat in a bucket of water. Screamed.
• Realised the drowned dead rat was actually a drowned dead bird. Screamed again for good measure.
• Planted what I think may be a dead raspberry plant. But it’s planted now so.
• Made my foot loads worse. And I forgot to take the last two doses of naproxen so. 

Honestly. The things I do for Dionysus. 

Last night some of the girls were doing handstands so I did a handstand and they were like “Wow how can you do it so well?!” and I was like “Because I’ve done gymnastics like my whole life lol” and they were all “Ooooh! can you do this?!” and did a y-balance but I was like “no, because that’s all flexibility and balance” and they were just “so what do you do then?” and I was like “Oh the flips and stuff” and they were like “Oh do a flip do a flip!” and I was like “lol no ‘cause that’s how I hurt my foot” but they were all “oh do it! please!” so I did a handspring and I hurt my foot.

Fin. 　

Oh My God today my friend was telling me about a group of girls on her bus that she thinks I’d get on with and I was like “Why?” and she was like “I don’t know, they like that thing you like with the guy in it that likes chocolate” and I was like “OMFG MELLO”

Oh the guy that is putting my sister’s furniture together wanted to see my bed because they’re the same, so mum took him into my room saying “oh, sorry for the Teenaged Bedroom thing” and he was like “Ah, is she into all that One Direction too then”

In Pompeii, my sister and I spent ages planning this MTV Cribs episode that we were going to film in one of the roman villas there. It was brilliant. 

But then everyone who wasn’t my sister and I got moody and hot and hungry and we had to rush through the rest and I got angry because I’d literally waited 10 years to go there and it was one of my major childhood dreams and they were just being urgh.

The end.

As I was going through last summer’s photos, I remembered this had been sitting in my drafts for about 10 months. 

Remember that time when Dad pointed out the hill by the road near where my grandparents live, the hill we’ve driven past a gazzilion times, the road that I always think about highwaymen on because a) there’s loads of old trees b) it’s a really flat road out of London c) essex d) dick turpin, the hill that is right by this old, flat road that reminds me of highwaymen, and he pointed it out and casually says “That’s where they used to gibbet people”

Started listening to the Catch-22 audio book when walking the dog and just went around the field laughing hysterically and scaring off all the other dog walkers.

Oh also by the way, Hemingway was in my dream again last night, with whom I can only assume was either Belmonte or Joselitio. We were in a wet Paris street at night, laughing drinking absinthe outside a cafe. Belmonte/Joselito let me try on his cape and hat. I don’t know why he was randomly wearing the traje de luces but he was. Anyway I made some joke and everyone laughed and Hemingway hugged me.